The Only Thing Wrong With Jesus
          
            Only thing wrong with Jesus,
            Jesus wasn't very much fun.
            After turning water into wine
            You’d think he’d be a son-of-a-gun!
            He had a great compassion,
            But humor he had none;
            He had parables by the barrelful
            But he never made a decent pun.

            The only thing wrong with Jesus,
            He never made anyone laugh.
            He could multiply loaves and fishes
            And feed us with a wave of his staff.
            He could even walk on water
            Or melt a golden calf,
            But he never got everyone going
            By acting slightly daft.

            The reason I don’t like Jesus
            Is he didn’t know any good jokes.
            He never even cracked a smile when
            He was rising up dead folks!
            He never even cracked some eggs
            And said these are the yolks!
            And when he sat on the burning bush
            He didn’t say “Holy Smokes!”

            The only thing wrong with Jesus
            Was he didn’t do any Shtick.
            Being so good and righteous,
            He never said anything sick.
            We'd have known he didn’t mean it
            And he wasn’t just being a dick
            If he winked an eye and acted shy,
            In case it just didn’t click.

            So I never took to Jesus
            And made a great big fuss
            About going to the Holy Land,
            In an air conditioned bus,
            Or keeping straight the Sabbath,
            Bein’ careful not to cuss,
            Cause if Jesus wasn’t funny,
            He wasn’t really one of us.